Oh, it's been a while... 2 years to be exact. I knew I was absent for a long time but realising today that it has been exactly 2 years this week was still a shock.
Maybe I start out by saying that those 2 years have been full of exciting adventures, challenges, happiness, and unforgettable experiences but also a lot of self-doubt.
When I completed a course in Interior Design nearly 3 years ago I was full of hope, passion, and eagerness to become successful in this field. I tried to post on my Instagram and this Blog frequently, wanted to find an internship or work experience with an established Designer who could show me the ropes, and eventually feel confident enough to take on my own projects. And don't get me wrong, I tried. To this day I would try to get in touch with firms or self-employed designers to enquire about a collaboration but the few that replied would eventually end up not getting back to me, which knocked my confidence and created doubt. And while I worked on minor projects for friends and family, it never seemed to get me anywhere.
I started to think: Would anyone trust a stranger with zero experience with their beloved home? Who would ever spend money on my services? Surely people who are successful in this field have either gotten an excellent degree, more life experience and higher funds, better contacts within the industry, or sheer luck.
Do I even want to be an Interior Designer? What about Graphic Design? Or something completely different? Do I actually want to be career-driven or do I enjoy a more relaxed day-to-day job that I can leave behind at 5 pm and get on with my afternoon without worrying about it until the next day?
Honestly, I'm still not sure but having been more or less out of work for the past 6 months has shown me again that I miss working and being challenged.
In November last year, I left this job behind and travelled back to Australia to visit my boyfriend's family. Now it's April and our time here is nearly over, which has put me back on the job hunt, finding myself in a similar dilemma - I am not qualified for the jobs I am interested in.
But what if I am holding myself back? What if I just have to be more patient and trust my abilities? Take a leap?
Of course, I have been super busy with my job as a travel agent, which taught me many useful skills, I built precious friendships and was able to live another passion of mine - travel.
But because of that, my passion for interior design was put on hold for a while.
So I'm now thinking of finding a job that challenges me and has possibilities for growth, so that I can expand my skills as much as possible and make useful contacts. In the meantime, I want to do my best to keep my socials and website up to date without putting too much pressure on myself. I want to be outgoing and make contacts, hopefully find someone to trust me with a small project but not expect immediate revenue in return. I want to learn more every day, maybe explore Graphic Design or Marketing, be brave enough to invest in myself, try new hobbies, and most importantly trust the process.
Putting myself out there is scary but trusting that I will end up where I belong if I just give it my all is worth a shot, isn't it? Although I trust in the universe and in that what is supposed to happen will happen, it would be foolish to just sit around and wait for everything to come to me. After all, we're responsible for our happiness and success, and as long as we are supported and loved what can really go wrong?
Hello people, I am open for business!
With love,
Leoni
*To everyone who struggles finding their path, their passion, or thrive - you are not alone and good things are yet to come. Be courageous and brave, outgoing, and trust in your abilities because you are capable.
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